In my first year of journalism school, we had weekly assignments for our reporting class. I needed some advice on one particular assignment, so I took my 19-year-old self over to the teacher’s office. She greeted me with a smile, and answered my questions. Then, suddenly her eyes changed. Instead of smiling at me, they crinkled with concern.
She took a breath and began to speak. “Tina,” she began, “Do you like this course?”
“Oh yes!” I said enthusiastically.
“Because you seem very shy.”
On the surface, it may seem like an innocent observation. I was a shy, awkward teenager—she was right about that. However, I felt like someone had punched me in the stomach. You see, in journalism, “shy” was the kiss of death. Since I was 10 years old, I had wanted to be a journalist, and here was my reporting teacher basically telling me that she thought I wouldn't make it in the tough-as-nails world of journalism. Devastated by her words, I politely thanked her for her help, and slinked away in shame. I wondered whether I had any business being in the journalism program, and silently labelled her a dream killer.
Little did my teacher know the impact those words had on my life. You seem very shy. You seem very shy. I couldn’t silence her voice. Her words dizzily swirled around in my head over and over again. I was suddenly in the throes of a major existential crisis. For a long time, her comment stayed with me. I questioned myself, and wondered if I had chosen the right career. I asked friends and family, “Do you think I have what it takes?” I spent a lot of time alone, reflecting on my future. It would be a long three years until I earned my degree. Frankly, I didn't know if I was up to the task.
Amidst many tears, I realized that I had two choices: I could either believe my teacher, or prove that I had what it took. I chose the latter. I decided to turn the “dream killer” into a “dream maker.” I put all my energies into my schoolwork, determined to keep my dream. I realized that while I would never love news reporting, I was a good features and human interest writer. I loved publishing. I could find my niche. I learned that people’s opinions are subjective, that while someone may not like your work, someone else will love it. The key was to believe in myself, keep working at my craft, and I would succeed. School is like those childhood activities that our parents put us into. We are exposed to different concepts, and through trying different activities, we discover what we like, and what our strengths are.
As creative people, we must insulate ourselves against negativity, and not allow other people’s opinions to define us. There will always be dream killers, and it is up to us to turn the tables on the less than supportive comments, and become dream makers. I think about the wonderful career that I have built, and I can't help but smile. I wonder where I would be if I had listened to my teacher's comments. Thankfully, I was able to dig deep and redefine myself.
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